It wasn’t that long ago when a rather petite princess of a girl asked me if I wanted to FLY for the first time. If you have read any of my posts since then, a mere 10 months ago, you will know that I met that challenge with great trepidation. As though I had been asked to relax into myself for the very first time. As though all the tightness in my little ol ball of nerves could be released in one fell swoop. As though I might finally get to the place where my hands could rest upright on my knees in Sukhasana, in order to receive energy, instead of continually being palm down, grinding hard into my knees, looking ever so dutifully for a bit of grounding. Looking for tranquility. Searching the depths of my being for any, and all (which wasn’t much) relaxation. Trying to find the relaxation, and in that, knowing that the strength would follow.
Somehow throughout my life I had been hard-wired to press. To push. To persevere. And while many times these traits work for one’s strengths, the Yang can also cause a polarization of the Yin, rendering it useless. Acro Yoga, and of course, my general Yoga practice, has allowed me to delve into my Yin and resurrect it, learning ever so slowly how to bring my practice off the mat and enact calming techniques that are tested and true.
Four Step is an Acro Yoga flow that has always been a bit challenging for me, because one needs to go slow and methodical and to relax into each pose in order to best flow through the routine. It is the only flow where I have wiped out twice – both times landing on my head. Both times becoming a bit more fearful of ever doing that move again.
I think THAT has been the biggest lesson. Getting back on the horse. It’s been challenging. It’s been rewarding. It’s been HIGH energy and somehow through that high energy place, there have been tiny pieces of ‘ohm’ that I have managed somehow to work into my every day breath. Ah…..exhale. Always a work in progress. And always willing to do the work.